Step 1
Is God Good?
How do you feel about God? What do you think He is like? Would you take a minute to write out a description of how you see Him? (Its ok to be honest - He won't get mad, trust me, its ok to put your feelings on paper.)
A lot of people talk to God and they may even ask God questions but many people, when they ask a question, don't expect that God will answer them, at least not directly. It reminds me of a little child who runs up and asks a question but then runs away before she can hear the answer. I think sometimes we are afraid that if we stop and listen for God's answer to our questions and we don't hear one we think it will mean there is something wrong with us.
Would you ask God to keep the enemy (satan and all those on his side) from interfering and then would you read your description of what you think God is like - to God. I know that sounds scary but it will be ok, God isn't angry. Then would you ask God if your description is true. Stop and listen for a bit and see what He says. Then could you ask Him what He really is like.
His answer will probably bring up more questions like, "Why didn't you stop my abuse?" or "Why did you put me in my family?" Its ok to ask those questions. Listen for His answers. He probably won't answer all your questions right away. Sometimes He has to get us to a place where we can understand His answers. Kind of like a child needs to learn how to multiply before she can learn how to divide.
Be sure to write down the answers He does give you but also keep a record of your hearts questions that are still unanswered. An Unexplained Box is a good way to keep them.
Here are some more resources to work through.
Additional Resources:
- If you were abused by someone who professed to be a Christian Exquisite Agony by Gene Edwards may be of help to you like it has been to me. The Amazon.com description states: formerly titled Crucified by Christians, Exquisite Agony is a beautiful and wholly unique book which points the wounded Christian to healing and to full restoration, even to triumph and ascension. If you have ever experienced unjust treatment from another believer, this monumental literary work is for you. From exquisite agony your life can enter into that of resurrection.
