Once we come to Jesus, admitting that unforgiveness is a wrong attitude that we need to be freed from, then the process of healing can begin. But healing is seldom instant. If we don't realize that healing takes time, we can suffer unnecessary soul searching wondering if we have truly forgiven the one who offended us. It's been my experience that once we have asked God to forgive us for the sin of being unforgiving and we have put into motion the necessary prayers for God to bless this person, then in the spiritual realm it is a completed work. However, we don't always feel we have forgiven because we still feel the pain of not yet healed emotional wounds. There is a process to being able to feel this forgiveness deep within one's self. For me, the process began with confessing to God my sin of unforgiveness, then praying for the person who had hurt me, and asking God to heal my wounds. I have found that I have to literally invite God into this healing by telling him all about how I feel and what hurt me and asking that he show me my responsibilities in all this. I ask him to tell me how I am supposed to regard the incident and to show me how to handle it. There have been times when God told me ask someone's forgiveness. He knows, however, that not all people are safe for me to be in close relationship with.
